A Little Holiday Prep Can Go a Long Way Towards Holiday Cheer

Let’s be honest, the holiday season with all its good cheer, is also filled with lots and lots of stress! And, for families with a loved one on the autism spectrum, this can be doubly true – unusual transitions, large gatherings of friends and family, disrupted routines, overwhelming lights, sounds and smells, new and unfamiliar foods… and the list goes on.

But, with little forethought and preparation you can reduce frustration and help everyone – including your loved one on the spectrum and yourself -- enjoy this special time of year (or, at the very least, get through it in one piece).

You know your child best! So, plan ahead by taking into consideration just how much “holiday cheer” your child can tolerate. Being realistic about this can help inform your decisions about such practical things as avoiding trips to the mall, what your home’s holiday decorations will look like (and the timeline for putting them up), what your holiday meal menus may include, as well as where and when you’ll spend the holidays.

Involving your child in the planning can be a wonderful way to prepare them for what’s coming and can help them take ownership of the decisions you make together. Giving them choices, along with trying to maintain at least some elements of consistency with their regular daily routine (or their familiar/preferred items) can also be a great help.

Helping your child prepare by knowing what to expect is in another key component of good preparation! Use their typical visual support systems, and consider adding a special holiday calendar. Mark special holiday events like family gatherings, travel days and concerts or plays. Consider creating social stories for holiday event – it’s a wonderful way to share what to expect before an usual/different/new experience. Be sure to scheduling time to go over the social stories several times with your child in advance of the events to get the most benefit. And, helping your child recognize guests that you’ve invited before they appear in your living room may also be helpful. Try putting together a photo album of friends and family and use it during quiet time before the get-togethers to help him/her recognize people s/he may not see often during the year.

Role playing is another great way to prepare. Practice some typical situations that may arise during the holidays with your child. Again, knowing what to expect, what it might look like and practicing how to respond can help relieve/reduce the added anxiety associated with the holiday season.

Finally, understand that sometimes the best thing for your child, and for you, is for them to simply take a break. Planning ahead for a quiet, sensory -friendly space for your child, and supporting their need to disengage, can make a huge difference for them and for you! Have a quiet space set aside for your child that he or she can access whenever the holiday “cheer” gets to be too much. If you’re not going to be at your own home, speak with your host in advance and ask them to help by arranging for a quiet room away from everyone where the lights can be turned down, soft music played, etc. for your child. And, again, make sure to show your child the space before they need it so they can familiarize themselves with it in advance.

Apropos being away from home, make sure to always have a healthy selection of your child’s favorite items -- including snacks, books, toys, sensory items, etc.—readily accessible. These “comfort items” can make a big difference!

So, prepare ahead, be realistic, involve your child in the decision-making process and try to enjoy. The holiday season can truly be a wonderful and joyous time of year for everyone – including for your child and for you!

November 26, 2019